HODLers for life. For those who bought brilliantly into crypto before the world caught on — only to lose their passwords, PINs, seed phrases… and eventually, the plot. Eternal HODLers who stay poor, while lessons are learned (by others).
Every story published on the HODLawards platform becomes an official Nominee. Each may (or may not) earn sponsor swag — if we have sponsors and if they have swag.
The HODL community votes via 👍 Thumbs Up on the wildest, most tragic, or downright legendary crypto fails. Our editorial team may also curate standout stories to ensure fairness, diversity, and ridiculousness.
Once a year, we crown our winners. It might be via Crypto Twitter, Spaces, Discord, or (if someone funds it) a full-blown media spectacle celebrating crypto’s most glorious mistakes.
Recovered your crypto using a psychic, shaman, or custom-built drone? Sorry — no HODLaward for those who claw their way back. But you might earn an Honourable Mention.
Winners may receive:
Extra prizes
Swag
Interviews
Immortality in the HODLawards Hall of Fame
We’re still evolving — send us your feedback, your fails, and your funniest crypto catastrophes.
You must be the direct cause of your own crypto catastrophe. No blaming hackers or tornadoes.
Examples:
Saved your seed phrase as “My Crypto Keys” in your Contacts? ✅
Threw out your hard drive despite knowing it held your BTC? ✅
Got rugged by a scam token? ❌ That’s just crypto.
This is a tribute to self-inflicted brilliance, not an invitation for intentional sabotage.
To qualify, your mistake must result in crypto being permanently removed from circulation — reducing supply and, theoretically, helping the rest of us pump.
If you later recover your coins? Congrats — but you’re disqualified. Honourable Mention at best.
We know edge cases exist. The HODL DAO reserves the right to debate these.
We honor only the highest-caliber failure. Not just everyday stupidity.
Not a HODL:
Losing a password
Buying the top
Getting phished by a Twitter bot
Definitely a HODL:
Tattooed your seed phrase, then got it laser removed
Hid your Ledger in the woods and lost the map
Trusted a startup called Satoshi.eth69
This is financial self-sabotage as performance art.
This is crypto. Trustless by design.
We never publish real names or identifiable info unless:
It’s already publicly reported
The individual has gone public themselves
Your secrets (and your shame) are safe with us.
HODLawards is a satirical storytelling platform built by and for the crypto community. All stories are:
Submitted by users
May be fictional, exaggerated, or unverifiable
Intended for entertainment and education, not fact-checking
Not financial advice
We do not verify submissions and accept no responsibility for their accuracy. Stories are user-generated or based on public domain information.
No Doxxing
Don’t include anyone else’s private information without their clear consent.
Light Editing Allowed
We may tweak submissions for grammar, tone, structure, or humor — without changing the spirit of the story.
You Give Us Rights
You grant HODLawards the non-exclusive right to publish and promote your story (anonymously) on our platform, social media, and other channels.
No Payouts
This is for glory, not gain. No payments, just memes, swag (maybe), and internet immortality.
Honest Intentions
You confirm your story is either:
True to the best of your knowledge, or
Clearly fictional/satirical — not intended to defame or mislead.
Your submission contributes to the greatest collective cautionary tale in Web3. Together, we HODL — and sometimes, hilariously fail.
